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Toddler Behavioural issues

My 5 year boy is very naughty and aggressive. He loves to go to school and play with his friends. But he is very careless and absent minded that he usually hurt his friends or himself. He get punished in the school mostly everyday for not listening to the teacher or for hurting other kids.

Sometimes it's very difficult to deal with him as he shouts and hits me and my husband when we try to make him understand this faults or not letting him do something that he wants.

We now have our 2nd kid. Though he has not done anything wrong to the baby, I am scared. I wish I could change his character before the baby grow up seeing his brother's notorious behaviours. Can anyone advice me regarding how to change his character?

Comments

  • I had some issues like this with my middle child. She would bite people a lot. Luckily, I was fortunate to not have to send her to school because I was afraid she would hurt another child. She's almost 7 now and doesn't seem to do anything like this anymore, but she did struggle after we had my newest baby and even though she didn't hurt him, she didn't like him at first.

    Back then, I had to watch her closely and just try to remind her of what it feels like to be hurt and ask her to recognize when she would get upset enough to want to bite. Then I'd tell her to take a deep breath and count to 10 or try to go away and do something she liked before getting too angry. Then when she calmed down she could talk to the other kid or tell a grown-up. (she did bite me one time too)

    She still gets upset sometimes and yells instead of doing what I asked, but after reinforcing it over and over again, and trying to model my behavior similarly, she will usually either try the way I've taught her or she'll tell me later that she should have done it that way.

    And by the way she really loves her baby brother now.

  • There are a few things that could be going on here. If you have been consistent in giving consequences and if you have tried modeling your behavior so that he can follow, there may be other things at work here. Not having a first hand knowledge of your child it is hard to say. My grandson displayed similar behaviors. We tried everything we could think of for months on end and nothing seemed to take hold. My daughter finally asked his pediatrician about it and she referred them to a behavioral specialist. After some testing, we found out that he was Autistic. Now that we know what we are dealing with, we have seen a drastic change in his behavior. I am not saying that is what is going on with your son but if you have tried everything you know to do, it may be time for a doctor visit.

    As far as the baby, try to keep your older child engaged with the general care of the baby (always supervised of course) Keeping him involved will give him a sense of responsibility for his new sibling and make him think more before he does things around the baby.

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